How it all started
During one of our usual 'I miss you, I love you' Skype chats, he suddenly asked out loud, 'Do you want to try to have some fun?'. I heard him the first time, but just to be sure (and to avoid embarassment), I pretended I haven't heard it, and loudly said, "What?" So then, we had our first ever Skype sex. While Skype sex is already to be expected- Since we were a sexually active couple, I knew at some point, he would have requested me to strip in front of the camera, but I didn't expect it to be in Week 1 of LDR. Masturbation is never on my to-do list, and it never occur to me how to get satisfaction alone nor did I take to it even after having encouraged by him. It was after the Skype sex session was over, a few hours later, during our non-commmittal Whatsapp conversations that he asked if it was 'wrong to ask for a few full bodied pictures of me'. I was so quizzed, and I reconfirmed again, he told me to take my time.
So I sent a single one, taken in a hurry in not-my bathroom. It was what I thought a nice 'nude' should look like, I've always heard of the idea of sending nude pictures, I just wasn't sure what blurred the boundaries between nude pics and pornographic images. So since it was my first nude, a modest shot of the breasts, down to my privates. It was a selfie, so the legs were automatically cropped out. I loved his voice when he told me how beautiful I looked. The tone of his voice, you would have thought he was marvelling at some miracle goddess descended from heaven, I felt empowered. When I felt that way, there was no stopping it.
Volunteering all the way
He never specifically asked me to send more pictures, but he just hinted that. And I know he would like it. So I sent another first, this time (and all the rest), it was not a selfie. I wanted to achieve Titanic's 'paint me like a French girl' pose, or simply a mermaid pose. With my thighs pressed together like a proper lady, and lying on my side, the nude looked nice in natural sunlight, demure, and serene even. This time, his affirmation and love of my beauty, instead of just melting my heart into a puddle, sparked a kind of furore. I wanted to be there for him. In an odd way, I thought this was perhaps the best way of showing I cared, I wanted to be intimate, I wanted to be his loyal partner.
After another Skype sex session (our second), in which he directed and took very provocative snapshots of me in various positions, as he put it, I felt like a pornstar. His pornstar. I promised him (although he had seen so much of me already), I would send him my own pictures. Right after we disconnected, I took serious fantasy porn shots- my curvy pear shaped body sideways, a full on spread lips that leaves nothing to hide, and a bent over shot from the back with my body leaning far forward, full view from the back and face still visible in the mirror. With nearly all the shots, I now realised that it is important for nudes to have my face in it at all times wherever possible, otherwise there is no difference than normal pics. I guess that what he means by full bodied pictures:) One great night of sexting where we both stayed awake till 4-5 am (6-7 am for him), our texting went wild and the next day after, I sent naughty housewife pics to him. The choice of clothing was very gender-centred, and what can I say, it really showcased my butt in a understated, yet sexy and playful manner.
After a while, I felt really dirty and tired of it, I thought I had enough, I can't possibly keep this up and keep sending all those pictures. In all those nudes, I aimed to appear beautiful, sexy, hot and erotic, everything under the sun, except vulgar. There was only truly one vulgar pic, wait, make that 3: where my legs were spread wide, a close-up of my lips, and one where I was posing in action. Through sexting, I discovered to my dismay after a normal Skype chat that, it was a bit devastating to discover that he only sweet talks when he's horny, and man, how could I blame Cathy, I'm a sucker for sweet talk, especially when it's the worshipping, adoring my body sweet talk.
I thought I was sick of it already, I mean, I kind of objectified myself as a sex object, but isn't if really confusing, that although it is what it is, I don't really view it as being objectified (perhaps until the singing praises dies down), I genuinely felt a thrill after sending those pictures. The feedback, as I know, won't vary much, but it was always interesting to note his tone (quivering or dreamy), and his choice of words: which so far, had covered nearly everything: beautiful, incredibly beautiful, hot, sexy, my beautiful, beautiful angel. I really feel so empowered! And seeing good pictures of myself adored by him turns on my self-love several notches up! Which is not so surprising then, that I delved right back into it, when he asked me what I was doing, when I happened to be doing nude yoga. I was just starting actually. Hearing his chuckle and nice 'mmm' after I told him about doing yoga nude, I could resist no further. He didn't even have to nudge me, he just left it at, "enjoy yourself". I knew it would be impossible, thus I began with a nude lotus, which he really appreciated. The second best shot I got out of the whole lot of nude yoga poses, would be the upside-down pose (proper name: Wide legged forward bend) where he could practically see everything: the two halves of my body folded into each other, yet it could be beautiful seen. The only pose where you could see all three: rounded butt, lips and nipples upside down. He extremely loved that one:)
And that brings us to the end. The 'text' part of sexting, when done continuously, is extremely fun and thrilling- the words get to me like an erotic novel, the detailed descriptions of what he would do to me is a huge turn on, the 'sending nude pics' part of texting was a great fun challenge and works my creative impromptu brain cells, and the feedback is the one that makes my day.
The icing of the cake was when he sent back a text that said, 'My collection <3' with all his favourite pics. I felt proud of myself. Sexting really fires up a long distance relationship (even better since we never tried sexting when we were together). I just want to keep our normal conversations going as I know, if compared to sexting, it is probably 100 times duller, but it is necessary, and vital in fact, to make the relationship valid and organically a relationship, not obsessed with sex culture.Sexting empowers me, as long as he is receptive and positive with glowing comments, it fullfills both of us, and explains without words my willingness to reveal myself to him as a partner. Not just a girlfriend he said, but a partner. I guess that means, we are getting somewhere.
Despite his annoying behaviour of not wanting to take any selfies (even when we were on the Great Ocean Trip alone!), he has uploaded a few selfies, two pics now that I recall, one of me in Melbourne, one of us in Zhivago, where he tagged me as 'partner', so this has redeemed it. I know I shouldn't keep tabs like that. The long waits are worth it then, I hope we can meet at least every six months, but I know even that would be asking for too much from him, so I am keeping it down, asking is okay, but begging is not, and I know it annoys him when I keep pressing him for a date. I know things are not as we planned, but the first kiss and cuddle would mean so much to me after not seeing him for ages, and naturally we will go all the way as we did during my graduation night.
P.S. Nearly 2 weeks of LDR. Skype. Skype sex. Revolutionary sexting. Loads of free time. Chores. Procrastination. Job-hunting. Upcoming CNY.
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