Here’s an interesting thing that I learned recently - to compartmentalise. It’s a coping strategy that allows you to categorise things away and put them into different ‘compartments’ so you are able to fully focus on the matter at hand. It allows you to stop spending time worrying or dwelling, and focus only on what’s important in the present.
This concept has appeared to me before in a book called Eragon where the main character had to undergo severe prolonged stress and trauma and suffering. But before he became broken, he visualised himself locking the ‘core’ of himself - his name, his identity m, his memories- and safely stowing it away in a drawer, knowing that he would reopen that drawer one day and his core would be completely unharmed and untouched.
And then he did what he needed to in order to survive the situation. He could barely understand things at the end but once he was freed from the situation, he reclaimed himself. And everything that was good and whole - burst forth.
And that is what the power of the mind does. My friend Fadz does the same, she tells her mind firmly that she will not let herself feel sad and cry because of work. She told herself that she would not let her friendship fallout affect her. And she turned her attention on to something else and put that part aside for as long as she needed.
And she is able to reason herself throughly and be prepared. And as a result, be able to face anything and everything and still keep going with minimal impact. I find all this pretty inspiring.
Sure, it is natural that you would want to keep a bit of distance with a particular person whom you believe have caused your pain. However, try not to close your heart during the healing period, try to open your heart, loving yourself a hundred percent, doing things that make you happy. When you feel calmed down again, you can initiate an open and honest heart to heart talk with this person, without holding grudges, or you may have already been able to move on, and I congratulate you for your growth.
Actually, all miseries in life are just illusions created by the mind, all experiences in life are here to help you grow and evolve. Perhaps at this stage of your life, you think you cannot live without this person, or you would only ever love/marry this person, but the law of the Universe is that we can always move on with or without a particular person. The earth will keep spinning regardless; the sun will keep rising and the moon will also still be on the beautiful night sky.
And do not forget that we are just little creatures living in a little tiny planet called Mother Earth, and the earth is just a tiny planet in this tiny galaxy called Milky Way out of at least one billion galaxies in the observable Universe!! So how can anything be such a big a deal in life?
So wake up and do not get trapped in trivial matters in life (that is, pretty much all matters that cause you pain). In a world that is full of suffering and pain, we really need to have more open hearts, so keep your heart open, shine, keep spreading the love (to whomsoever concerns) and keep dancing, never forget that life is celebration — to be alive is a divine gift!
Never forget that the source of love is from within, the source of love is YOU. Be the light and keep spreading more love to the Universe.
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