'Send, send', he told Siri exasperatedly. I looked at him, he was in a laughably cute argument with the AI, Siri, who failed to understand 'send, send' as the word 'send'. This funny moment was captured, along with many more moments. As a person who is impressionable, I longed to hear compliments, to hear praises and words of affirmation and acceptance. I was giddy beyond delight and couldn't stop giggling the first time we met, every word from him send me into peals of laughter and burst of giggles as my poor brain tried to stitch together the sound of the voice simultaneously appearing from him, he is the source, it is no longer my phone in that instant.
However, as euphoria and magic fades (even in Cinderella, a stolen moment never lasts, and they never show what happens beyond the wedding, leaving it vaguely to a happily ever after ending), I began to notice too quickly that his demeanour hasn't changed one bit (he chided me for telling him how to hold the phone for a selfie shot) and his compliments (other than 'I missed you' and 'you look good'- when prompted) were not easily forthcoming. However, the sincerity in his voice, his 'thank you's and mournful apologies when I had to pick him up and send him back were very much truthful. Besides, I saw with my own eyes, how responsible a citizen he was, when he dialed the fire brigade when we witnessed a blaze near Taylor's buildings. No doubt there that he was a righteous man who had the courage to do the right thing. It made me appreciate a little better why he was always on his toes about bad news and criticized so many things the government were doing. Not that it was any better hearing him rant on many occasions, including when we were supposed to be relaxing in a breathtaking location, I had to firmly but gently request him to tone down everything and start to enjoy and relax in the moment without interruptions. Our four day secret escapades were definitely something I would remember for a long time.
It's been a while since I did pictures postings, and since pictures speak a thousand words, why not?
Day 1 (Tuesday)
Disastrous but excellent-for-bonding first date in the public park. After Googling some images of the KL Botanical Gardens, and also to reminisce our Adelaide days where we did most of our dates wandering about in parks (and by that I mean we left no park unvisited, no stone unturned), this date was meant to recreate that feeling of intimacy and closeless, the one that you can only get by walking side by side with a person, and talking comfortably without having to look at each other gazes for too long. The pretty pictures got me sold. However, the weather was a deal breaker. It was so humid that we were sweating buckets within minutes of merely walking around at a leisurely pace. It wasn't uneventful though, we saw a couple of interesting things, a lone white girl with a guitar sitting on the grass, a baby alligator on the loose, a lot of red bushy tailed squirrels, and a menacing monitor lizard. We also got hopelessly lost.
Sunken garden (He thought 'Taman Sunken' was a Japanese Garden!)
Bamboo hut
Gifts:) How very thoughtful of him!
Besides getting me chocolate and paw paw lip balm, he was extra considerate and bought extra chocolates for my family, my sister in particular.
It was mostly rosy and cheery except when he became a little bad tempered when we got stuck to the jam, adding to the fact that he was so used to the Adelaide lifestyle that he found Malaysian drivers maddeningly rude and inconsiderate, prompting him to swear and utter words of despair often.
We ended the day pretty early after a dinner at Nu Sentral, where we went around looking for places which were all booked in advance due to the fasting month, and finally managed to get seats at Tony Romas.
Day 2 (Wednesday)
Figuring today would be the day we get to spend some downtime, I brought along gloves and socks in case we'd go ice skating at the IOI City Mall. Remembering how he loathed the structure of the last mall (Setiawalk Mall), I was dearly hoping he would be impressed by the new mall. Well, impressed is an understatement as I would soon learn, that he gets bewildered, absolutely shocked and bewildered to the point of being in denial and questioning, when the city landscape changes. It all seemed a tad too drastic for someone who isn't used to tall buildings anymore. And when you live in a slow paced neighourhood where construction in the city still isn't finished after close to 2 years (Adelaide Research Centre for the new hospital).
Alas, I didn't take him to the water fountain areas where it'd be quite romantic with the lights. And we meandered about a little cluesslessly in the mall. It wasn't too bad, as in the end, we managed to catch an okay movie (Me Before You), and he bought three new cotton shirts from Cotton On (ironic!). Prior to the mall, we walked around in the heat to fix my car remote, and had lunch at Secret Recipe. We also broke the ice in the morning at his aunt's apartment. There wasn't much participation on my end, it felt familiar and the same drill, but I definitely felt confident in a carefully chosen all black ensemble.
My favourite view of blue skies and upwinding path
We usually look terrible in pictures, but he has a charming smile here (cheesecake on plate :)
Day 3 (Thursday)
The euphoria had really worn off now, as we take the high road to Bukit Tinggi, I began counting the amount of fuel and toll I had spent and was going to indulge further (he generously offered to split the costs after). The journey surprisingly didn't take too long, and we had arrived, far sooner than I had imagined as there were very few cars headed the same way. In fact, we were almost the sole car heading uphill! To my dismay, the stables were closed. It was my third time coming here, and as fate would have it, I was once again not destined to ride a horse. I had always wanted to do so, as horses are animals that reminds me of medieval times and princes, and it would be the sweetest thing to see your man greeting you on a horseback. Of course, I wouldn't be playing the part of the damsel in distress, rather I would be like the modern Cinderella, who greets the Prince as an equal, riding side by side on horseback.
After the disappointment, Colmar Tropicale seemed less exciting. We even got ripped off for lunch, paying twice or thrice for a normal meal of fried rice and sandwiches that took ages even though we were the only patrons. Again, his habit of being connected to world news 24/7 reared its head here, as I calmly talked myself out of it and opt to instead play with a cat, which kept coming back for food and got annoying after. The Japanese gardens didn't do much good either, as the Japanese teahouse was now only open to people who rent the kimonos, and the garden was indeed small and nothing to shout about, especially once you have visited the immaculately landscape gardens in Tokyo.
As he led the drive back, I snoozed in the car, and upon reaching KL, it was still way too early to call it a day. We headed to The Mines, I thought it would be a good idea as it was the closest mall to his place. Again, the day wasn't going swimmingly well. We managed to find free parking but lost all sense and purpose as to what to do when we entered the mall. We heard that the Ice Palace had already been closed. There wasn't much to it, we had Auntie Nate's where I made a mess of the chocolate churros-like snack, and shopping wise, he got himself some new socks while I bought lounge pants from Uniqlo.
Day 4 (Friday)
Not one to be disheartened, I spent yesterday night reading up on quotes, and relationships. In the end, I found a one size fits all kind of advice- Give more, demand less. It works on the level that we are never satisfied with how much we get, and we will end up demanding for more and more, the destructive cycle can only be broken by the goodness and kindness of giving. Because the satisfaction of giving is self empowering, and can only result in goodwill, you can also derive happiness from watching other people being happy from your actions. I think the morning where we performed prayers at the Four Faced Buddha in Bukit Tinggi, he also said a quote about selflessness, something along the lines of 'It is only through suffering that the soul achieves enlightenment', as per the original teachings o Buddha, as the act of suffering is meant to reflect compassion and selflessness, a common theme in religions (how Jesus suffered for our sins and died on the cross, for instance). The only difference is that Buddha had meant his principles as teachings, not to be followed as a religion per say, but more to guidance and life advice. I also had a nice feeling as I was able to relate to the Sun Worship (Om Bu Bur Bakti?) song that was playing, long forgotten memories for both of us- his, of his aunt's playing the song as a daily morning ritual, and mine as a chant I learnt in yoga.
And thus, with the mental chime of 'give more, demand less', I wanted to make the day very special, as it was also the end of our week together. After a hiccup at security and appearing very fishy, I showed up with recycled!, but fresh and real! flowers and coconut water for two. A master at concealing his surprise, he greeted me warmly as a friend would and took the flowers without any crazy emotions other than appreciation. We sipped coconut water, I was already in a playful mood but he was still in his childlike demeanour, it was difficult at first, but in the end, it worked. We were passionate lovers once more, this time I was the act. I poured my heart into it, and got rewarded with a stimulating massage, something new. Then it was back to blissful and lazy, cozy cuddles. We got all cosied up that he wandered if we should still make a call for Sunway Lagoon. Although my legs were slightly aching, I wanted to be in the water. It would be carefree and happy, and soaking up the sun nonetheless.
I suppose I was waiting for a 'you look drop dead gorgeous' comment when I made an appearance in my first public bikini, but he made no reaction whatsoever to the swimsuit. None. Fishing for compliments didn't get me far either, as the 'you look good' comment was curt and of course, not offered as it was prompted. I thought about playing the other card, where he usually counters my comment and soothsays my worries when I tell him about feeling not great about my small boobs. However, I thought better of it, as I wanted to be a confident woman, not one that was insecure. Frankly, thoughts like this are already insecurities, as self gratification is no one's best friend, it can only lead to woes as you base your worth on other's merits and judgement. That slight disappointment evaporated as we experienced the thrill and joy of going on every single ride without a queue. Even though I felt dizzy after the vuvuzuela, it was plain awesome not having to queue at all (usually we would be standing waiting for hours!). Walking through the cascading curtains of the waterfall was also cooling and refreshing, we did it twice.
The best thing was stumbling upon the Nickelodeon Water World, where I drew up my guts, and despite feeling absolutely terrified, went into a Hunger Games style ride, a straight drop, where you get closed off in a glass-like case, and the ledge you're standing on gives way on count, dropping you straight down into the unknown below. Crossing your fists over your chest and standing on a ledge which is about to be released any moment, my face itself read terror and I had my eyes scrunched up and fearing the worse. The transparent casing just makes it more dramatic, It really was the most frightening ride, but it was over in seconds, and the ride down was smooth and quick, you only have a little time to experience the sensation, the drop, the rush, and it was over before you could scream your lungs out. The post-ride feeling however, was insanely good, as you marvel at your own courage for attempting something which was crazy. It was a good high.
All in all, having these dates with him makes me realise that just as I can easily shut him out and push him away, I can also crave him and his company. Nothing has changed but if you were to compare to the last visit in Adelaide where he was completely turned off, our interaction improved heaps here. His family didn't come between us at all, something which I am very glad of, as I always imagined him to be moody, depressed and sour when he's got his family around. This wasn't the case, although he'd still grumble about them every now and then (along with the striking differences between the two places- the traffic, the cost of living, the people). In the pursuit of new and exciting things, some people don't appreciate what they have until it is gone. After so long we spent listening to each other's worries, and while at times we often rub each other off the wrong way, the key is really to communicate. And also to keep cultivating positivity by giving more.
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